It was yesterday that I realized that I was ‘too‘ involved, when my nine-year old son walked up to me as I was gulping down the last piece of roti at 9:30 pm demanding that I play cricket with him.
My belief was reinforced today morning when my four year old made me read out 10 stories to her (we started the first one at around 6:15 am and were going at it almost continuously amidst glasses of milk/tea and nibbles of breakfast) just as I was trying to leave for office at 9:00 am.
“Why can’t you leave me alone?” – I almost screamed out… when I just realized that it was I who hadn’t left them alone long enough or frequently enough all this while. So now, I end up having kids who simply want “amma” to tell them what to do and to do it with them – be it writing, playing skittles, building Lego sets or colouring.
I had gone from being just ‘involved’ to being a ‘helicopter mom.’ So, this post goes out to all those who are on the verge of becoming like me. Remember, it’s never too late to stop and hold yourselves back. I have come up with 5 signs that will tell you that you need to change! (Note that this is applicable for parents of children who are in 1st grade)
- Your child cannot entertain himself/herself for 15 minutes at a stretch
- Your child doesn’t get to/know to choose his/her own books at the library ever
- You structure your child’s weekend by drawing up a time-table
- You pack your child’s school bag and sharpen his pencils (Gayatri - thanks for this one )
- Your child doesn’t know what “imaginary” play is
I have a confession to make: till sometime back, I would have put a ‘tick’ against all five of these items! Do you have any list items of your own to add? Go ahead, share them with me. And, while you are at it, PE has some interesting insights for you in one of the earlier stories on parenting styles at http://parentedge.in/coverstory_parenting-styles/.