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Battle of all times – Sibling Rivalry

A familiar story to every parent of two or more children, “sibling rivalry” can sometimes really stress out a mother.

Sibling RivalryI have 2 kids – a 7 year old boy, Rohan and an almost 3 year old girl, Shriya. Rohan, who is otherwise, very “macho” in his choice of games and toys, loves to grab and play with Shriya’s dolls every time she sits down with them. Shriya, who is typically happy to sit with her grandmother surrounded by play dough, puzzles, toy cars and colours wants to play only football, BeyBlade and cricket when her brother is around. So, what’s new ? The answer is “Nothing” !

I’m pretty sure this is how it is going to stay for generations to come. I’ve heard platitudes like “This fighting will bring them closer” “That’s how your uncle and I used to be when we were kids and that’s how you were with your sister” “It will pass – this is how brother and sister will bond“… et al. While it all sounds fine, I still feel like banging my head against the wall most of the times !

And that has set me thinking : how can a young boy be the trendsetter and leader, in school and in the playground,and ape his baby sister at the same time ? How can a toddler stumble through her alphabets and numbers yet know exactly how to irk her brother into shouting and hitting ?

If any of you have the answers for me, I promise to treat you at the best restaurant in town !!

Also Read : Sibling Harmony


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Like most mothers she knows, Ramya juggles between finding something that satisfies her inner self and doing something that satisfies her family! Mother of two children, a boy and a girl, her parenting philosophy is not so much to be a popular, cool parent as to bring them up with values that she holds dear. When not donning her 'amma' hat, she switches between being 'manager of Digital Learning at IIMB', 'payer of bills', 'cook', 'cleaner' and 'reader of PG Wodehouse and Georgette Heyer.'

2 thoughts on “Battle of all times – Sibling Rivalry

  1. Aparajita Bose

    I’m actually glad that there’s at least one more family like ours where the same things happen, that too when the gap is SIX YEARS! When there’s no solution, imagine for a few moments you are just a neighbour, NOT the mother. So just CHILL as long as matters don’t go out of control! :) On a more serious note, if such things don’t happen, it’s either one of them being dominated by the other OR one of them is matured beyond his/her years (that’s BORING)!

  2. Gayatri

    Sorry Ramya, but there are no answers – sibling rivalry is universal, whatever be the kids’ ages. I remember being surprised when my neighbour’s kids, 15 years apart, still fought with surprising ferocity at times. To us onlookers the little one was a cute little angel, but to the older brother, she was an annoying pest at times, and he reacted accordingly.
    In another family, the younger sibling had a life threatening heart ailment, and was accordingly mollycoddled and petted by all of us around, but his older sister treated him very normally, slapping him down if he tried to take her stuff – to her, he was just the younger brother, loved but also the occasional annoyance in her life.
    If you want some consolation, they usually outgrow it with time… :-)


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