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  • India’s most comprehensive parenting portal, with excerpts from ParentEdge – India’s leading parenting magazine

How to become an effective parent


 

Source: Google images

Source: Google images

Have you noticed that we as parents are less patient with and more scared of our children? And have you, at any point in time, thought that our parents were able to handle us better, compared to how well we handle our children? And when all these questions are raging in your mind, have you ever wondered why this is so? Why we are not as competent, if not better than our parents? We should come out as parenting experts, right? Considering the amount of knowledge, the ‘how tos’ and ‘what tos’ that are available for us.

Today’s parents have a modern outlook. With both parents working, many children either grow up in day care or boarding school or with nannies, so the family bonding happens only during the weekends or holidays. Eager parents, in order to create happy memories for their kids, are ready to ignore the bad behaviour of their kids. So what is the solution to all this, you may ask? Well here are few things we can do make parenting a happy experience while raising socially responsible kids.

Discipline with firmness

Kids know and understand your tone! So whenever you are trying to discipline them, do it gently but with firmness. The idea here is to let them know that you are the parent and they are your children. However, don’t ever try to dictate your terms, as that will make them rebellious. Remember whatever can be achieved with gentleness will not be achieved with threats and dictatorship. So avoid dictating if you want obedient and well-behaved kids.

Lay the ground rules

Your kid knows your weakness and knows that you get embarrassed easily if he starts throwing tantrums in the public or starts pestering you for a toy at a toy store. Before venturing out with your kids make them understand that this time you are not going for toys shopping or anything else. So they have to behave in the mall or market. Tell them about what is acceptable and non-acceptable behaviour and appreciate them whenever they behave properly. Tell them that you are happy because your kid was the well-mannered child. Once you start appreciating them, your kids will start behaving themselves, thus making you less hassled parents.

Don’t budge and give in, don’t be scared of tantrums

Children from the beginning know how to twist parents on their little finger, so if they are in they are in a difficult mood, just remove yourself from the situation and tell them you will talk to them when they are ready to talk in a civilised manner. Don’t ever give in to their cries and tantrums, else they will conclude “Whatever I won’t get by asking, I will get by crying.”

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Swati Nitin Gupta is a journalist with extensive experience in writing for newspapers, tabloids, magazines and online media in India as well as Middle East. She has written on a range of topics, from human interest stories to event coverage to features on topics like fashion, beauty, women, children, travel and general health issues. As an Indian Army officer's daughter, Swati has been been exposed to the various cultures and lifestyles of different states of the country – knowledge of which she tries to incorporate in her writing. Swati also maintains her personal blogs at swatisays.wordpress.com and swati1012.wordpress.com.


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