a) Specify the outcome ‘what do you want to accomplish’?
b) Paint the big picture. ‘Why do you want to accomplish that?’
c) Stay away from the ‘How should you accomplish that?’ unless you would like to specify acceptable and unacceptable ways (not as per your standards but as per generic standards that exist in the world, like ethics, for instance).
Delegate your child’s life design to your child. Be there to guide the child and share your experiences and those of others around you. It is the toughest ask of a parent. Are you up for the challenge?