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Sons vs. daughters


Source: Google Images

Source: Google Images

It is indisputable that God has made boys and girls with their unique features or characteristics. Any parent who has been involved with the upbringing of his son and daughter can vouch for it. Born in the same family, with the similar genetic traits, they tend to differ drastically from each other. Agreed, no two individuals are the same, not even identical twins; but if you observe the personality traits of boys and girls, you can notice a wide contrast.

Daughters being treated more like princess, are the delicate darlings of the house (particularly in the present day scenario). They are more of a ‘Touch Me Not’ types with cent per cent development of their exclamatory instincts like Oh!, Ooh!, Ouch!, Wow!, Aha!…and so on. While their brothers need more of a reason for such expressions, at least in the early stages of their life.

On the contrary, to see your son growing, you need a heart of a stone. You, as a parent, tend to become bolder and stronger, on seeing your son perform different, difficult and daring stunts every day. Your heart skips a few beats, your breath is held for few seconds, your mouth is wide open unconsciously and you stand still to register what your eyes would have seen, when your son comes close to you after one of his usual new bravery acts (read it as stunts) and asks you casually, “What happened mom…Why are you standing in a statue position?” At that point you are just thankful that your heart did not jump out from your mouth, while you gasp for few breaths…still speechless.

In spite of these God made differences, we as parents have the responsibility to bridge this gap. While it is natural for every sibling of one gender to have complaints about the so called extra privileges being given to the sibling of the opposite gender, we as parents must try to give equal rights and duties to both. To elaborate a little, their roles should not be demarcated or distinguished according to the nature of the work. Both should be taught to share the household work with equal efficiency and so is the case with the management of work outside. A daughter should not be made to do all the housework just because the society expects her to take care of the house in future, nor she should be denied any outdoor work on the similar reasoning. The same thinking applies to your son.

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Raina Bajaj has worked in the education sector for many years now. Working with children in their formative years has given her insight into in understanding children’s needs, aspirations, desires and psychology. It is her belief that what we teach our children is not always important, but how we teach them makes a huge difference in shaping their overall personality.


One thought on “Sons vs. daughters

  1. Ramya Srinivasan

    Yes, Raina. IT is upto us parents to ensure that we instil the same set of values in our children – be it son or daughter. I make a very conscious effort to make my son do everything (like clearing the table, cleaning up) that my daughter does more readily and vice-versa. My daughter is allowed to throw balls, jump up and down and make as much noise as my son! If we, as parents, stereotype them when they are young – then we can’t expect them to talk about an equal society when they mature. The key is, as you say, to find the child’s mental and physical strengths and develop them.

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