This blog post has been contributed by Parenting Matters (http://parentingmatters.in/), a Chennai-based organisation which partners with parents to build skillsfor deeper connection in families. It provides platforms for parents to learn together with input from trained facilitators. It conducts programs, workshops and also aims at spreading awareness on parenting through articles for magazines, talks with experts and its blog. This blog has been written by Deepa Aravind, who was one of the participants at a Parenting Matters programme.
This story brings out the fact that when we see the interaction between children, we often do not know all that is going on. We do not know what each one is feeling and why they behave the way they do. So as a parent rather than judge them and try to be the arbitrator, if we just keep trusting them and acknowledging their feelings, they are capable of handling things in a way we would never imagine.
Suddenly I realized that he is not being mean for the sake of being mean but because he was angry about something. I was glad I did not judge him. I only said, “You are very upset that she shared your secret with thatha. You really wish she would not do that.”
My daughter was still keen on playing with him in the mattress. She said, “Mummy I also want to go in.” I said, “You really wish Anna would let you play with him. It is time for a bath – would you like to play with cups while you take bath?” I then asked my son if he would want to join us in the bath.
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