Sometime back I received a book to read and review. It was an interesting book on parenting. Before you reach a conclusion and think “Oh no! Not another guidebook on parenting,” let me tell you that it is not a guide book. Instead it is a book that every parent (irrespective of their stage of parenting) must read, as it is a book with incidents and examples taken from the author’s personal life to make her stance clear.
The book talks about how positive parenting is quite feasible. The author says that we need to follow six Cs for better parenting and to raise happy kids. The six Cs are – Connect, Coach (life building skills), Care, Community and Commitment. There are many things that I learnt from the book and here they are:
1. Connect is the base of the parenting. So we as parents, especially moms need to ensure that our ‘connect’ with the kid is strong. If our ‘connect’ is strong then parenting becomes easy. Remember that connect is the essence of parenting and if you want to raise a kid who is socially responsible (and I am sure all of us want that) then we must understand that connect is the base where you are sowing the wholesome seeds in your kid. So how to make your connect strong – by listening. By listening I mean paying attention to what your kid is saying and then appreciating his thoughts. For example: At times when my son complains about a misbehaviour of his fellow classmate then I listen to him complain and once he is finished I ask him “So what do you want me to do about it?” He will give the list of things like “complain to his mommy.” And that’s where the ‘connect’ comes in. I tell him “Ok, I will do that but what if she told me that there is another angle to what you have told me?” And to this he says, “Alright mom I will handle this myself.”
2. Coach! The word may sound scary to kids and parents alike, as there is a heavy connotation to it. However, as parents we need to understand that even before the child begins his or her preschool we need to teach our children some things that will help him in his growth. According to the author (and I too agree with her), coaching doesn’t mean instilling things in children in an authoritative manner. For example: If you want to teach your kid to say sorry or thank you then you need to talk to them in a gentle manner and ask them how would they feel if somebody hurt them and didn’t say sorry to them or if you give something to someone and that person didn’t say thank you. The child is smart and will understand what you are trying to say from that moment onwards will never forget to say thank you or sorry.